When Life - The Soul'ful Series - A Deep Dive Into My Spiritual Soul
The cultivation of my spiritual soul doesn’t have a specific story. I never had this life changing “revelation” that caused me to find myself or that defined my faith walk. Although, that is often the story for most. I have always had a close relationship with God and a deep faith, but I am nowhere near perfect and that faith is tested daily. Some days I pass. Some days I, well we won’t say fail, but I am definitely skating on thin ice as my parents would have said.
I would say that my spiritual soul is like an ocean. Some days the water is peaceful. Other days it’s choppy and I feel like I’m frantically searching for the lighthouse.
Just when I think I know how to navigate my ship, a wave comes crashing down and tosses me around like a rag doll. As soon as I begin to get comfortable in my little spot, a shark comes circling. That is the beautiful and mysterious thing about a body of water. How it can seem so calm, but a little further out a storm can be brewing. The same goes for your spiritual soul. You can feel so peaceful and grounded, almost feeling like there is nothing that could waver your faith…never knowing just what lies ahead.
My personality is to figure things out for myself, but even a good captain knows you can’t steer the ship alone. My mother and grandmother are my spiritual soul tribe. They are the barrelmen, or the lookout, up in the crow’s nest of my ship. Growing up, I watched my mom learn to steer her ship, or her life, with my grandmother, up towards the sails, looking out for her. My mom was on her journey of faith. Trying to navigate through life. Finding what kept her anchored. When to dock her ship and when to push through a storm.
I watched as my mom and grandmother sat at my grandmother’s kitchen table and talk about raising children. They talked and prayed about my dad who was very sick when I was growing up. I can just picture my grandmother out on the ship, shouting to my mom at the helm… “Cathy, you have to keep going. I can see a light. I can see a break in the storm.” “Maybe we should stop here. Drop our anchor, and be still.” You see, my mother needed my grandmother with her experience. She had life experiences, but she also had more experience with having her faith and spirituality tested. She had sailed these waters before and knew the territory. Areas in which they were both unfamiliar, my grandmother was there to provide her with the tools, or in this case the scriptures necessary, to overcome the storm.
As time went by my mother became more confident in her walk with God, and more confident steering her own ship. She was ready to have her own crew.
I have always had a close relationship with God. I can’t remember a time where I wasn’t comfortable praying or talking to Him. However, that does not mean I had a mature relationship with Him, or was confident in my faith. More times than not, I can remember yanking the wheel from anyone trying to help, and being more than happy (or so I thought) “teaching myself” how to steer my boat. It was my boat, and I did not need some deckhand telling me what and how to do things. That approach has served me well in some areas; but in trying to develop your spiritual soul and be at a peace with handing someone or something over to be handled by a greater power…let me know how that works out for you. Not so much. You can’t do it all. You just can’t. You can’t be at the helm trying to navigate rough waters without needing someone there to help. Whether it’s a simple, “I am here for you. You aren’t alone in this,” to, “I have been here before and it is going to be okay. I see a light up ahead. I know you can’t see it yet, but it is there. I promise.” This is where the importance of your soul tribe comes in.
Your spiritual soul tribe are the people who help you plot a course and sail through life. They keep you grounded, or anchored. My soul tribe reminds me who REALLY has the wheel. I watched my grandmother show my mom how to use her Bible as her map and her faith as her compass to guide her on her course. As I grew up, and even to this day, my mom is continuously providing me with scripture and teaching me how to read my “map.”
I hope that my children, as they get older and understand, see how their Gigi is helping their mommy find her way through life. That I, yes, struggle sometimes, but I overcome. Sometimes that may mean trudging through, sometimes it means staying still and waiting, or it may be putting the pieces of the ship back together after a storm. It is never giving up. It is never letting your crew down.
For me, my spiritual tribe is my most important one. There will always be things I am sure that spark the warrior and rebel within me, but those parts of me need my faith and spirituality to help propel it forward. Yes, even rebels and warriors can lose sight of where they are going and what they are fighting for. I find my spiritual soul kicks into high gear when those facets are wearing thin. It’s during the times where I am in the midst of being a soldier or fighter when I need my faith most.
If the aspects of your soul were a pyramid, I believe you would find your spiritual soul as the base. It is the foundation of your entire inner being. When your spiritual soul is at peace, your warrior and rebel are more confident to make their appearance and flex their muscle. Your relationship with your spiritual soul can absolutely turn the roughest of storms into the stillest of waters.
I want to thank Lucky Soul USA once again for being the inspiration behind this blog series.
Joy, thank you so much for reading and following me along. That really means a lot to me! You have no idea. That is exactly how I seem to feel all the time. I think I can do it all alone and I have it all together, then all of a sudden I’m shown that I totally DO NOT have it together. I am so glad we are connected in that! Much love to you!!
Melinda, you put into words every feeling, and emotion I feel as I walk through my spiritual journey. So many times, I think I have it all together, and then just like that, I’m lying on my back wondering what happened.
Thank you so much for your blog! I truly enjoy reading it, and it’s a huge inspiration for me.